To The People Stuck In Suicide Lane Snowbanks
Dear Billings People Stuck in Suicide Lane Snowbanks,
As embarrassing as it must be to get caught up on a snowbank in the middle of a busy road after attempting to ram your way through to Arby's, I have to say thanks for giving me a few laughs.
But also, are you gonna be ok?
I was on my way home for lunch on Grand Avenue once this week when I witnessed my first "Suicide Lane Snowbank Situation", which I've named myself.
Yes, my first one ever.
This is my second winter living in Montana. I'm originally from Wisconsin, and we have just as bad if not worse winters (here's a site that claims Wisconsin is colder in the winter - I will stand by it till I die, give me crap if you must).
So after living through subzero, snowy winters every year for 25 years in the midwest, I admit I've never seen anyone stuck in a snowbank in the suicide lane before. Either I'm blind, have good timing, or Wisconsin people are just way better drivers...
Today on the way up Grand, I noticed the suicide lane snowbanks had been plowed away. Honestly, I was a little disappointed because it meant there'd be fewer chances to be entertained by an unfortunate winter driver.
Lucky me, I ran into three city plows that were clearing the banks and to my guilty delight, a driver stuck up on the snowbank right near the plows! Of course, everyone was gawking, because why does that guy get special plow treatment?
But don't get me wrong. I was quite impressed to see people pulling over to help the driver out in the middle of a super busy road. I'd seen others helping Suicide Lane Snowbank Situations earlier in the week, too.
Stay safe out there, Billings. Hopefully, none of these drivers I witnessed are missing parts or pieces from their vehicles now.
If I see one of you in the Suicide Lane Snowbank Situation, I might stop to help. But not until after I've had my giggle and asked why you tried to plow through with your little four-door.