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I'm sure that my headline made you stop what you are doing to delve into exactly what magic nugget I might find. This task isn't sexy, but it was necessary.

Initial findings include a pair of reading glasses I assumed stolen, several name tags, and what I believe might be the largest collection of Chuck Norris jokes in the world.

The big orange notebook that helped us find songs in the original CD library. In it, there are no Kenny Chesney songs. None from Alan Jackson either. Would you believe that there's nothing from Garth Brooks?! We've worked here a long time.

orange book

My inventory also includes a contact smartphone charger, glasses cleaners, my General Lee can koozie, a couple of name tags, my CD's that range anywhere from "The Best of School House Rock" to "Jerry Clowers Greatest Hits." I knew that you'd be impressed.

name tags

There is also a little jobbie that is supposed to clean your glasses but doesn't. I can get you a piece of floss, loan you a cheap mechanical pencil or try to impress you with my Bob Seger tickets stub.

The magnet that Donna Miller gave me that I cannot fold back into its original square shape no matter how hard I try. And I've been trying for about twenty years.


I've got a cassette that somebody sent me of part of one of my dad's old Grass Roots Gold shows recorder a long, long time ago.


My "Green Book/Songs On Every Subject." comes in handy. I could've used that last week when we found out how many songs contain the words "Mason Jar." It's more than I thought.

Now that this project is done, I won't need to clean it out again for another 20 years.

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