
10 April Fools’ Day Headlines About Montana That Might Be Too Believable
April Fools' Day has always been particularly fun for me, because it's also my birthday. And it seems like life has been throwing me tricks ever since my kindergarten birthday party.
I clearly remember my family and a couple of my little pals gathered around our dining room table, getting ready to eat birthday cake and ice cream, and my Grandman teased, "You don't have the chicken pox, do you?" It was apparently going around at school at the time.
"No", I said defensively. My grandma jokingly pulled up my shirt to look. And sure as heck, I had pox all over my stomach. Everybody at the table laughed. Hilarious, right? I was mortified.
Read More: Which Montana Town Will Get The New Women’s Prison?
We have a company policy that typically prohibits satire articles, but oh, how I wish we could. Can you imagine a Montana-specific version of The Onion? That would be awesome.

Today, in honor of April Fools' Day, I'm breaking that No Satire rule. The following Montana headlines ARE NOT TRUE... but several of them sound almost believable.
1. Montana Announces Statewide Sales Tax
In a shocking move, state officials confirmed a 6% sales tax will begin immediately.
2. Billings to Install 11,000 Parking Meters in Shiloh Crossing
All parking spaces in Montana's largest shopping hub will now begin charging by the minute. City officials say the revenue will be used to build more roundabouts.
3. Grizzly Bears Now Free From Retaliation
After years of being euthanized for what the bears say is "alleged violent behavior" with tourists, the grizzlies scored a bold victory with the recently enacted Bears Have Rights Too Act.
4. Montana DOT Promises to Finish All Road Construction this Summer
Every project. All at once. Completely done by October 31.
5. Yellowstone Park to Require Reservations for Old Faithful Selfies
Officials say the booking system will streamline the Park experience and keep people moving along.
6. Bozeman Declares Itself Affordable Again
Despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, the Bozeman Chamber of Commerce has rolled out questionable new verbiage in its Welcome to Bozeman marketing materials, touting just how affordable it truly is in the Gallatin Valley.
7. Heavy Snow and Freezing Rain Expected for July 4th
Perhaps one of the more believable satire headlines, because it's happened before.
8. Glacier National Park Removes Going-to-the-Sun Road Traffic
Officials say visitors will now experience zero delays, no congestion, and instant parking at Logan Pass.
9. New Montana Transplants Fleeing the State by the Thousands
Apologizing profusely for "ruining Montana," every single person who moved here because of the Yellowstone series has had a change of heart. Real estate prices for 20-acre ranchettes in Paradise Valley have fallen to historic lows.
10. Town Pump Eliminates Gas Station Casinos
With the company's rapid car wash development, the largest convenience store chain in Montana announced they'll be shuttering all of its in-store casinos and converting the space into cannabis dispensaries/vape shops.
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