Instead of another colorful picture of paradise, I give you: (a rendition of) the elevator panel in our hotel.

First of all, there is no "Lobby" button. For the lobby, press 2.

Next, which button do you press to get to the floor that your room is on? Usually, room 5417 would be on the 5th floor. But since the buttons only went to 4, let's try that one. Yep, that's it.

And you want the floor where you can just walk out to the swim up bar or beach? Press zero.

I don't know if this is a Jamaica thing or not.

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